to dream the impossible
I keep feeling I should have thoughts. I’m not sure what they should be about, but really, they should exist.
I’m floating in some sort of ill-defined haze of “wonder what I’m doing now”. Not the really desperately needing to be done work. Tomorrow. Tonight I saw Shrek 2, which was clever. Wasn’t Farquaad supposed to be in it, though? I know I saw him in some previews. Why didn’t John Cleese speak in his own voice?
Today I got a spoof email purporting to be from PayPal, which I reported, but the site is still up — though it seems to be actually on PayPal’s site itself, so I have no idea.
I read a book (I forget the title), which was marginally interesting, though mostly not, which had as its main character a “linguist” (I respect that the author wanted the character to be a linguist, but could s/he not have found a topic that linguists actually study? The poetry of someone or other? Not so much) who couldn’t find an academic career (in the 80s) and ended up a tester for some software product. There were interesting comments about academia, but what I most liked is that she ended up vastly wealthy and doing work she found interesting.
I can dream, no?
May 23rd, 2004 at 11:38 pm
You’ve just made a huge move and moves are not just geographical, not just physical, but psychological as well. It’s a state of being, all its own. You’re adjusting. I always think it’s important to take your time with these things (not that my follow my own advice, but there it is. ;))
May 24th, 2004 at 1:25 am
I got the spoof email too! Sent it promptly to the Paypal spoof team, like you. Whoever wrote it was thorough: they even say at the bottom that you should never send your password by email etc. etc. but go directly to the paypal site instead. I think the links just appear to be on paypal - if you can make an email appear to be coming form someone other than the actual sender, you can certainly mask a URL to trick the browser into showing the desired one…
I agree with Michelle - give it time. And dream about making it big, then running into your colleagues from the program you just left who weren’t that nice to you and being so much more interesting and beautiful and successful than they are.
May 24th, 2004 at 10:58 am
See, I am a spiteful person, so there are some people that I actually wish dismal failure on. Not many — most people I don’t really care whether they succeed or not, and some I hope do well — but there we are.
I’m giving it time. Of course it feels like it shouldn’t be so big a change; I’m moving back somewhere I’m comfortable — but it’s a change anyways, and I’m sure I’m just discounting the difficulty. I’m sleeping 10+ hours a night, which must be helping.
May 25th, 2004 at 12:12 am
It is a big change. You just moved. It may take weeks or longer to begin feeling settled. It’s not as if anyone ever moves back home and slides back into the previous psyche anyway. (Hence, the saying, “You can never go back home.”) So don’t shortchange your feelings about the change. They’re worthwhile.
And eventually, you probably won’t care to feel spiteful towards any of those people. It just won’t matter. Rest up, relax, and take care of yourself.
May 25th, 2004 at 10:26 am
Eh. A little spite never did anybody any harm. A *lot* of spite, sure… but this doesn’t sound like a lot of spite.
Just a little. And a little spite is just fun, really.