I ordered something from the US, which is to be delivered by Fedex. No problem! Fedex delivers to Canada very well. Except not to my house, because apparently “Montreal” is not an actual city in Canada, while merged-and-soon-to-be-demerged-but-still-officially-Montreal-suburb where my parents live is.
I have now watched a few minutes of ‘Deal or no deal’ (”the show that has been a sensation in countries around the world, including China, Egypt, and South America”) and I can absolutely say that this show is absolutely idiotic at its very best.
Question: how much longer will I watch it in annoyance?
A week or so ago, there was a discussion at Ozarque (just generally a very interesting read, by Suzette Haden Elgin), spread over a few posts, about, generally, money. Much of the conversation annoyed me, but I am now calmer about that, so I am going to respond to it, in parts. (I am wolfangel78 there.)
The gist is this: SHE was responding to an ad which went something like: a teenager girl asks her father for 80$ for jeans. He asks the name of the designer, goes and buys stock in that designer, and hands her the cash.
I pointed out that no designer sells their jeans for that little, that, in fact, average jeans come close to that.
The conversation then began to revolve around what is average, and what is reasonable, etc etc.
(I’m trying not to be too defensive, because I think this is just too reminiscent of my old roommate, who would sit there and wonder how I could spend my money on whatever, while she enjoyed using my whatever, which grated.)
We had lots of people laughing. Ha! Like Gap is average! I can get my jeans at Target/Walmart/thrift shop for 30/20/2! That’s average! Well, no, it’s not. Average means in the middle.[1] Not the cheapest or the most expensive. Of course you could get them for less, or you could get them for more. Ignoring the 4 digit prices, it’s easy to get 2 or 3 hundred dollar jeans at a mall in any middle class neighbourhood. Thrift shops are not average prices by any means, though you might be able to make a good case for 30$ jeans.
Then we had the Well, it’s just if you care about brands that you shop at the Gap, Target/Walmart/thriftshops have jeans that look as good and last as long etc etc. Point one: expensive things are often expensive for a reason. They fit better, wear better. Point two: my time is worth something. I can walk into a Gap-brand store and I know the jeans there fit me well. I dislike shopping for jeans, so making this process painless is worth something on top of my time. Gap is certainly not a trendy, cool brand, either.
And there was the question of morality: is it *immoral* to buy jeans that cost 80 dollars? But at what point is a luxury immoral? Is it immoral to go out to dinner, since you could make the same food at home for less? Immoral to buy other than the store brand of anything? Immoral to travel, since you could save all that money? Immoral to buy new computers, or more expensive computers than you absolutely need? Buying them at all, since there are public libraries with computers? Immoral to use washing machines instead of washing your clothes by hand? Immoral to buy books, because you could go to the library instead, or donate all the books you buy to the library? Immoral to see movies? At what level are we allowed to spend more money to make our lives easier or more pleasant? Is it only ok to ask this of people who have money, or can we also tell people without money that it’s immoral to smoke or drink or eat dessert or whatever? Stephen at Ethesis also made this point, which no one there responded to. Presumably because everyone has their own little luxuries which they are understandably unwilling to give up. My contention is that if you have some, you really have no basis to condemn them in other people.
Of course I judge people too — someone remarked upon a $10million bat mitzvah which is really horrifying. I don’t know where I draw my line, but it’s somewhere after 80$ for jeans and before 10,000,000$ for a party.
But it’s interesting, the amount of self-righteousness — to which I was not immune — there, about what is and isn’t appropriate or ok to spend money on, what people do or don’t “deserve” and what they are or aren’t “entitled” to. (I dislike those verbs; they give much the wrong emphasis.) Where it is okay to spend money on yourself and where it isn’t. (The answer, of course, is that whatever I do is right, and anything different isn’t.)
I want to defend spending more than the absolute minimum of money necessary, but I am not into conspicuous consumption, either, and I can’t figure out if this is just the answer above or something more thought-out. I am not sure, either, why some things are okay to spend on (computers, books, food) and others not (clothes, televisions). I can come up with some ideas, of course, but none seem quite right.
The word ‘need’ doesn’t work for those purchases but — few people only purchase what they actually *need*. It’s rather hypocritical.
In the end, I try to stick to one rule: you can insult what other people buy or like (it’s fun), but not to their faces.
[1] Yes, it has other meanings, many of which are precise.
I am getting my period — without much crampy! yay! — and I *recognised it* when I was feeling sad and miserable and wanting to die. Unfortunately, I have now learned that knowing it’s hormonal while I’m going through it doesn’t actually change anything, except that “I will be miserable forever I should kill myself” turns into “I will be miserable once a month like this for the next twenty years I should kill myself”. Which in the end is no better.
On the plus side, though, I will be period-free during the vacation, except maybe the very end of my period will overlap with the very beginning of vacation.
Okay, not really. But I figured, hey, time to bitch about the war-on-Christmas we-prefer-holiday-tree. There are lots of thoughtful discussions around, so I won’t bother with that.
First, I’m lumping everyone who believes in Christ as the saviour together as Christian. If you don’t like it, show me how you’ve carefully differentiated between different groups of people who are in other religions, and I will be shocked. Then I will do nothing, because see above about not bothering with thoughtful. Seriously, for the purposes of discussing Christmas, it’s close enough. I am not going to differentiate between different types of Jews, and I’m not even going to mention other religions.
Recently in our lovely local paper, there was a discussion about how — alas! — Christmas and Chanukah fall on the same night this year for the fourth time in a century or the first time since 1954 or whatever and people don’t know what to do. I was puzzled for a while, because Chanukah is EIGHT days long, and so I am sure they hit each other more often than that. Then I realised they meant that the first night of Chanukah[1] was Dec 25 this year, to which I continued to think who cares, because Chanukah is still eight days long, just celebrate it on the last night, which is more fun because there are more candles anyhow.
This article was about interfaith couples, where one is Christian and one Jewish, or where at least one parent of is Christian and celebrated it. So we had all the rabbis saying “No! You must choose one!” and honestly, I’d choose Christmas over Chanukah, but Passover over Easter, so that’s probably a bad way to go. Plus, you know, if they’re raising the kids Jewish, a Christmas tree isn’t going to taint them with goy, and it’s something important to the other parent, obviously. Respect towards your parents and their traditions is a good thing. The article was just idiotic, so I will move on.
Now we can go to carols. I like Christmas carols. They are very pretty, most of them, and I don’t really listen that much, so I don’t get sick of them. There are, however, no really nice Chanukah songs. Oh there are some that are okay to sing if you’re in elementary school, but at some point we can give up on ‘I have a little dreidel’. If you insist on singing them, I rather like Maoz Tzur. (Why? I don’t know.) In summary: Carol of the Bells, yes; How many candles?, no.
Christmas[2] trees. They’re not secular. Seriously. They’re very pretty, and I’ve enjoyed going to tree decorating parties, and I go and look at really nicely decorated ones, and I don’t mind not seeing Chanukah stuff (though I always appreciate it if I do see it), and I am all for having decorated Christmas trees around, even on public property. Yes, for you personally they might be secular. That’s nice. Are you any religion at all other than Christian? Hint: if your family is full of atheists, find the last religion that your family celebrated. You can say that it has no religious overtones to you, and fine, whatever, who am I to judge. But it’s not up to you to then say that therefore, it is secular for everyone. Yes, I know it’s not religious like crosses and creches are. But it’s also not just Happy Winter like snow.
Also, there is no need to wish me Merry Christmas earlier than Dec 24 or later than Dec 26. Just say Happy Holidays, and pretend you are remembering that not everyone actually celebrates Christmas, and act as if you realised that December/January holds whole loads of holidays — including but not limited to Christmas.
Happy Holidays.
[1] Jewish days start at sundown, so celebrations start the night before the first day. Which makes calendars obnoxious, because half the time ‘First day of Passover’ means first day and the other half it means first seder. Jewish calendars invariably choose the first, but secular ones are less clear.
[2] I will not, however, play the etymology game. The Christmas in Christmas tree is a clue, yes, but somehow this leaves people arguing that holiday *used to mean* holy day and goodbye *used to mean* god be with you. Just go look at the past tense there.
You plan ahead, and are interested in beauty, design, outward appearance, and symmetry.
You are a shy, idealistic person who does not find it easy to have relationships, especially intimate ones.
You are diplomatic, objective, and live in the present.
You are a talkative person, maybe even a busybody!
You enjoy life in your own way and do not depend on the opinions of others.
I am a shy, talkative person.
Today was less of a sit at home and relaxy day than I had intended. It was relaxy, but not at home, and someone is coming over in about an hour. So that will need to be tomorrow, when I will get done all those things I am desperate to get done but not quite desperate enough to actually, you know, do. Things like organise my books, backup my photos, download some new photos, update some ipod/itunes stuff, move my bed — nothing tricky or unpleasant, just stuff I need to get done.
Near record snow yesterday. I had great fun pointing out all the cars that were utterly buried in the snow (as in that last link). I am not sure why they amused me so. But it should be mostly gone in another few days. I hope.
I was supposed to be elsewhere by 9, but not so much. I just gave up and spent money on overage minutes.
Also I am supposed to pick up hummus today. So at least I will get to walk outside in the snow for a while. I am in a discontented mood. I wonder if I am getting my period.
Tomorrow I need to do all sorts of back and forthing, from my house to my parents’, back and forth. Why? Because I haven’t organised myself well. Normally this would be fine except hey huge snowstorm sometime tomorrow. My mother is upset because (a) she is worried my sister’s school will be cancelled, meaning her exam will be postponed til next Friday, meaning vacation-leaving will be postponed til late next Friday instead of earlier or maybe Thursday evening and (b) there was supposed to be a family dinner for Chanukah but at the very least my aunt and uncle won’t trek out from the West Island and possibly my other aunt and uncle won’t be bothered and my grandparents might decide they’re not comfortable driving in the snow and . . . so she’s disappointed.
I am out of poached pears, but I made oatmeal squares which are my favourite dessert and, since they have oatmeal, clearly healthy, so it will be a just fine weekend, me and my books and my fireplace.
Today my head is hurting and Tylenol is not helping. Why? Must the world conspire against me so? I was also sick last night and this morning, I think because I ate something, though I don’t know what: of the people who ate the same dinner, my mother was sick, my sister wasn’t, and the cat, who ate the leftover tzaziki, was.
Perhaps I should consider Panexa. No need to ask my doctor; I have a great reason to take it.