a wolf angel is not a good angel

I have, I think, mentioned my fascination with reading advice columnists.

Dear Annie: At a recent family gathering, we were all greeting one another as we usually do, and I heard my 62-year-old sister, “Roz,” announce, “I don’t want any hugging and kissing.” As I turned, I noticed my husband move to hug and kiss her cheek, as he has done for 38 years. She then became angry with him.

Roz was very cool toward me the rest of the night. When we got home, I asked my husband what happened, and he said he thought she was just kidding. I called Roz the next day, and she told me, “I said I don’t want any hugs and kisses, and your husband did it anyway.” My husband has always greeted my sisters like this, as he does his own sisters.
My brothers-in-law always give me a hug and kiss, and I think nothing of it. I told Roz she could rest assured my husband would never hug or kiss her again. I said I’d be happy to take all of his hugs. She replied, “I would appreciate that!” She never apologized for her outburst.

My husband is a gentleman and would never do anything out of line. One of my other sisters called me the next day and said my husband could hug her anytime.

I do not want this to be a problem when we next get together, so please tell me how to handle it. Should my husband shake her hand? Am I wrong to expect an apology? Life is too short for little things like this to come between family members. — Embarrassed by Sister’s Behavior

Dear Annie;

My sister asked us not to do something, and we did it anyway, and now we feel slighted that she got upset. Why won’t she apologise?

Irritatingly, the response wasn’t: well, you don’t deserve an apology, it was more “she’s not going to apologise for her outburst”. I don’t actually see an outburst mentioned, but I’m sure it was there.

I think I hear chirping.

In my fireplace.

Been lying in bed, waiting to sleep, for a few hours now. I am tired enough to not be able to do things, but not tired enough to actually sleep, it seems. Worse yet, I have my alarm set for frighteningly early tomorrow, on the idea that I was getting to bed early today.

The newest fight on reasonable accomodations: cabanes à sucre without pork. (Well, no: pea soup without pork, and, sometimes, a set of feves aux lard without lard alongside the usual.)

Are they reasonable ways to try and get Muslims, Jews and vegetarians to go sugaring off, or a terrible insult to the Quebecois way of life?

• a table and chair set for my balcony;
• a lounge for my balcony;
• a new broom;
• a new umbrella;
• a drying rack for laundry.

In my defense, the stairs are very steep and narrow, so it’s a real pain to bring them up. The real reason, though, is the above-mentioned laziness.

I almost forgot!

• people who organise piles of things in stores so that only one style/size/colour is easily accessible, and you need to root around for the others;
• people who wear lots of perfume or cologne;
• people who throw their cigarette butts on the ground.

It’s a short list this week.

The election is coming up, next week. I am occasionally reading what people have to say, following sporadically the percentages, but mostly ignoring everything. Because, as usual, I want something that mostly requires many, many people to want what I want, and to vote strategically. I sometimes think everyone in this country votes strategically. I am not always sure this is a bad thing.

Montreal has been long neglected, because the PLQ considers it safe, and the PQ considers it pointless. Now suddenly, we have a third candidate, possibly an electable one. If votes from safe ridings — not D’Arcy-McGee safe, but more middle safe — start going away, perhaps the government will be more liable to quit ignoring the city. They can’t ignore it much more, so I don’t think there’s a lot to lose. (I have given up on hoping that the ridings are more or less equal in population, since that will never, ever happen.) In general, I want a minority government, because neither a PQ nor a PLQ majority seems like a good idea at this time.

The candidates are flailing. Boisclair is making stupid comments, and instead of apologising and moving on, he keeps insisting it wasn’t a stupid comment at all. You don’t get to decide what other people find offensive, especially if other people have historically been discriminated against. Even if you think it’s not offensive, your opinion is meaningless. But his actions remind me a lot of Tremblay, and is worrisome: politicians who don’t know how to strategically backtrack make a lot of stupid hubris-related mistakes. The candidate in my riding thinks that there was no genocide in Rwanda, just a lot of people killing each other. I don’t even know how many candidates have been outwardly xenophobic. Reading all of this depresses me too much.

There aren’t many parties to vote for. I won’t vote for a separatist party, so that’s a no on PQ and Quebec Solidaire (I am not sure what else they stand for, but a friend has suggested they are too left wing for even the left wingiest). I am unimpressed with the PLQ and don’t think they deserve my vote. (Amusingly, there are arguments that my candidate has used cocaine and thus is not a good candidate.) The ADQ is too right wing for me. There are a bunch of Christian parties, but I am not Christian and am creeped out by them. I don’t want to vote Marxist-Leninist. So I will vote Green, because who else is left?

I predict a minority government with PLQ in power — Boisclair made another mistake when he swore he would hold a referendum (”public consultation”) even if it were a minority government. Plus, I think he doesn’t play well in the rural areas.

On CBC’s Test the Nation, one of the questions:

If 2 < x < 6 and 4 < y < 6, what is the maximum possible value of x + y?

a. 2
b. 6
c. 10
d. 11

I see something wrong with this question. And not that more accurately it would have been 2<x and x<6, etc.

Update: found a place to complain, which I did. Nothing says procrastination like complaining about a game show on the CBC.

I ended up reading one of the books suggested (so far), PopCo, which, yes, gets far too preachy at the end, which is unfortunate, since it was otherwise quite the good book (barring the lack of answer to what the actual necklace meant — I know what number I would need to find the prime factors for, that was obvious, but I have exactly zero interest in actually doing the code-breaking for this book).

Mostly, I came off thinking that if globalisation etc is so bad, though, perhaps the author should not have published her book with a company owned by Rupert Murdoch, and I want to go eat a steak now. Preachy can end up putting people off your message.

If you skip the end part, though, the book is lots of fun. And all you miss is the stuff you can catch from any self-righteous vegan, anyhow.

You Are Likely A Forth Born

At your darkest moments, you feel angry. At work and school, you do best when your analyzing. When you love someone, you tend to be very giving. In friendship, you don’t take the initiative in reaching out. Your ideal jobs are: factory jobs, comedy, and dentistry. You will leave your mark on the world with your own personal philosophy.

Close. True, there are only three kids in my family, but first and fourth both start with the same letter. I love the choice of ideal jobs.

You Are Teal Green

You are a one of a kind, original person. There’s no one even close to being like you. Expressive and creative, you have a knack for making the impossible possible. While you are a bit offbeat, you don’t scare people away with your quirks. Your warm personality nicely counteracts and strange habits you may have.

I scare people away with other things but my quirks!